Heels On The Field: A Baseball Blog : Inspirational

Entries categorized "Inspirational"

March 07, 2014

Rays Spring Training Report: Lenny Linsky Focusing Energy In New Way

It's easy to be an egotistical chest-puffer when you're an athlete.

Who's going to call you on it? Maybe your teammates, maybe your manager, but if you're playing well, or you're highly regarded in the system, you might just be able to get away with it. Even players not so highly regarded have a hard time figuring out how to treat people and follow a respectable path, and you hear about them faltering all the time.

So if no one is going to call them on their BS, there's really only themselves left to the role.

Pitcher Lenny Linsky finally got to that point. But it took a hell of a loss to shake him up and get him on the right track.

"I was told I needed to calm down, to not throw so hard," he said from Rays camp in Port Charlotte Florida. "But I was like 'No, I need to go out and throw harder.' So I did that and gave up a grand slam. After that, I was thinking I was going to blow this ball by [a guy], then I ended up hitting him and getting ejected. I get in the locker room and thought, 'What are you doing?' So I ended up serving a three-game suspension during a four-game series and hit to sit on the bench for most of it. I was super embarrassed. And I just decided to do the opposite of whatever I'd been doing. I literally just told myself, 'I'm not going to try.' So, my first time back pitching, I was pitching really well and asked the guys in the dugout what my velocity was and they just said,'Dude, you were throwing harder than ever.' I stopped huffing and puffing and realized I just had to be a pitcher."

The Tampa Bay Rays drafted Linsky in the second round in 2011 out of the University of Hawaii, and he made his professional debut with the Hudson Valley Renegades of the New York Penn League (Class-A Short-Season)that same year. He logged a career high 39 innings in 2013, finishing 7-5 with a 3.22 ERA, five saves, and 52 strikeouts for the High-A Charlotte Stone Crabs.

Coming off of that momentum, he arrived at Spring Training this year with a singular focus.

"I want to show I've matured. My goal is to be the hardest working pitcher in camp. I can't control the uncontrollables. So I'm controlling what I can, which is how hard I work," he said.

Linsky, a native of Rancho Palos Verdes California was attending college in Hawaii when his awareness of the world around him and being a more spiritually connected person began developing. That development took time, but he considers each experience just part of his overall journey.

"Those struggles were good for me. I'm more committed, motivated and focused," he said.

For any player, Spring Training is a non-stop push to build up strength and prepare for the season ahead.

"You have to get used to being on your feet constantly. Each days gets better. I need those naps. Naps are common for guys during Spring Training! But then, you know, we get to wake up and play baseball. We wouldn't want to be anywhere else."

Linsky's road through baseball has been one of turning more and more inward, particularly after struggling physically and mentally through 2012. He had to reassess in order to grow.

"I wasn't the same pitcher when I came back. I didn't really feel different until the last few months of last season. I learned it doesn't matter how loud you are on the mound."

The downward spiral that led to his turnaround was simply part of the process. He doesn't hold back when he recalls the guy that he used to be.

"I thought I was the coolest. I was so egotistical and selfish. I finally stepped out of self. I just thought 'How can you be like this?' I came from a great family, went to a great school, and now I get to play baseball. I felt like an a-hole. I just decided I wanted to be a better person and help others. I want to be the guy that inspires my teammates when they're down. I removed ego from my mind."

Don't get the righty reliever wrong. He's still going to pitch with the same fire and intensity. The issue was learning how to channel that energy.

"When I'm on the mound, I feel like a warrior. We can all learn from our mistakes and learn from each other."

As Spring Training heats up with games beginning shortly, Linsky is determined to be this more clear-minded, stronger person in every aspect of his life, and, of course, when he's in the game.

"I just really want to apply those principles and be conscious. It's easy to revert to old habits. I don't want to forget the experience. I want to compete and have fun and get after it, but my baseball goals are bigger than me now. I want to share my lessons and be a good teammate too."

He turned 24 earlier this week, and he celebrated with the knowledge that this new year, this new baseball season, begins with more opportunities and a deep sense of purpose.

"I've kind of found myself as a pitcher and as a person."

You can follow him on Twitter @alohalinsky34.

For more of my Rays minor league coverage read links below and check out 'Hitting The Bull' this season on Minor League Ball. I'll cover the Durham Bulls in a weekly feature there.

Posted at 04:33 PM in Baseball, College Baseball, Inspirational, Minor League Baseball, Minor League Prospects, MLB Draft, New York Penn League, South Atlantic League, Spring Training | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

February 07, 2014

Padres Slugger Cody Decker Hits The Yoga Mat (Excerpt/PHOTOS)

San Diego Padres Cody Decker spoke recently about embracing yoga & adding the practice to his regular fitness routine. The story will run on MyYoga.com, but here's an excerpt and photos of the infielder practicing at Haute Yogi Manhattan Beach.

The stillness of yoga was not the call he heard, rather, it was the possibility of going even further physically.

“It was mostly to get more flexible,” he said earlier this week. “

“I know it's about relaxing and calming down...that's not really me."

Find out more about his approach and his thoughts on how yoga has impacted baseball players today, when the story runs later this month. Decker received a Spring
Training invitation to big league camp this year. He topped the 2013 'MiLB Twitter Twenty' You can follow him @Decker6.

Posted at 11:33 AM in Baseball, Inspirational, International League, Major League Baseball, Minor League Baseball, Minor League Prospects, Non-Fiction Baseball, Pacific Coast League, Texas League | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

February 03, 2014

'Hey, Heels': Eastern League, New York Penn League Memories

I won't forget the first moment I walked into a minor league clubhouse.

The big club's top prospect was there, and he was the ring leader. He made sure to make me as uncomfortable and unwelcome as possible. As did his teammates, relentlessly whistling, commenting, and laughing. I asked every question I wrote on my little notebook, working quickly, efficiently, then practically ran out. (I remember the door knob in my hand, and that it felt like I was in a dream, where the handle wouldn't turn and I would be trapped)

Then someone said I had to go back in, because the coach I was looking for was in there. I had to turn, walk back in, and do the dance all over again. I felt a little stronger, as if an invisible hand was pushing me forward.

Looking back now, I can see I was made of the stuff you needed to walk into those situations. But that took some time. Today, I don't think twice about any of it. I don't get sidetracked or scared, I laugh it off, or, if the big line is crossed, I deal with it in whatever way I need to.

That first day was an early beginning to what would become my niche, and, at that park, home of the Trenton Thunder, I would learn my craft, gain confidence, and grow (with many growing pains) personally and professionally in every way imaginable.

When I returned two years later to actually cover the Thunder, for the newspaper The Trentonian, for a few end-of-season games, that would begin the real development of my own career, style, voice, and true experience.

You learn that Double-A baseball is often closer to the majors than Triple-A. A lot of the top prospects at the Double-A level often pitch or hit their way onto the major league roster, when rosters expand, or a major league player goes on the DL. If they're successful at that level, often times, they're capable of playing in the big leagues. Sometimes, all they need is a quick jump to Triple-A, just to see a little more advanced competition. Other than that, it's a quite advanced level. And a lot of fun to cover. You're also aware that less is tolerated: less professionalism, less errors, less hustle. At that point, if you haven't proven a lot and can't do the right things without being told, you're going to have some trouble.

In short-season Class-A Penn League, most higher expectations are off the table. You see every error you never thought of and many you expect. That's not to say that the standard isn't still high. They're expected to show up and learn everyday, but that's just not always the case. Managers and coaches exhibit enormous patience with those guys, most of whom are just coming from college, only weeks earlier. There are always those guys that are even just out of high school. How can you expect them to be top professionals? Sometimes, that takes awhile. The players that moved the fastest through the system, from short to Low/High-A, were clearly on their game early on in NYPL. They stood out early and often. But most struggle with even the most fundamental things. I can remember one manager yelling to the infielders at BP, 'Take it on one hop!" It's that early in the going for them.

That got me thinking about stories:

*One player's father followed the team bus from town to town to keep him out of trouble.

*There were two times someone wouldn't look at me when I was interviewing them. One was a top Yankees prospect. On an unusually reporter-free night, it was just me and one other guy doing post-game interviews. The reporter asked him three questions, then it was my turn. Keep in mind, this was my second year covering that player. As I finished my question, he kept his head down, then turned to the guy reporter and directed his answers, to all of my questions to him. Worse than that was the Penn League manager that refused to look at me in his office during post-game interviews, same situation. Any question the guys asked, he looked at them. Any question I asked, he looked at them. This went on for the entire two years I covered the league. Some people decide you don't deserve their respect even after you've earned it. There's nothing you can do about it and they don't matter. They proved everything about themselves, not me.

*Player-manager issues aren't often reported, and, at that level really shouldn't be. There was a prospect that insisted he was being screwed over by the big club. When I brought that to his manager, I figured he'd give a sympathetic, neutral type comment. Instead he said, 'No one's come looking at him.' Meaning any team interested in trading for him. Oh...well, yes. You have a point.

*Staying on that course, it's rare that a coach will call out one of his players to a reporter, again, at that level. But when I entered the dugout during BP, a coach asked if I was there to talk to a certain player, and I happened to be that day. "Well, can you tell him to stop being such a baby out there when he's playing?" I didn't. But since I had permission, I guess it would've been fun to give that one a try.

My Eastern League coverage began just a few months after I'd created the 'High Heels On The Field' blog, which began as an all baseball sort of project. There wasn't a main focus, though I realized pretty quickly where I was headed and what I loved. By 2010, I had shortened the name to 'Heels On The Field' (due to a cleaner design, though the name remains the same), started a Twitter account in the same name, and announced the 'official' focus of the blog would now be all MiLB. This year, I made 'A Minor League Blog' part of the actual title.

Creating the blog and making it all minor league coverage has been an interesting, sometimes tricky experience. Some people didn't exactly take the blog seriously because of the name. Others found it 'sexy' or 'provocative', which was not my intention. 'Tongue in cheek' 'fun', sure. 'Clever', 'Bold', and just plain old 'rhymey' works too. Plus, I do love heels. I'm a sprite. Now I hear 'Heels' yelled out at games or colleagues just greet me with 'Hey, Heels.' That's my name now, I guess.

But what I intended, and still intend, as I move from the Eastern & Penn Leagues, into Carolina & International Leagues, is that the blog be a unique, trusted, fun, and always interesting place for minor league coverage. The blog isn't about one league, but all of the minor leagues. However, game coverage often focuses on one specific league, and that's just a geographical issue. I do like continuing to cover players at a new level of one team I covered a lot in Penn League, the Hudson Valley Renegades. With the Durham Bulls, my Tampa Bay Rays minor league coverage continues. Similar to how I went from covering the Thunder, to the Staten Island Yankees. I like having that connectedness. And I hope readers who are Rays fans feel a sense of trust in my opinions even more because of that consistency.

As previously noted, there will be new additions this year, including the first ever staff writer/co-editor, Matt Kardos, use of video, and more post-game, real-time highlights from myself and other writers.

The Eastern League and New York Penn League were my classroom. No matter what, I remained, and will continue to be, a student of this craft and of this game.

Thank you for the last five years, readers.

My feet hurt.

Posted at 02:15 PM in Atlantic League, Baseball, Carolina League, Eastern League , Independent League , Inspirational, International League, Major League Baseball, Minor League Baseball, Minor League Prospects, MLB Draft, New York Penn League, Non-Fiction Baseball | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

January 21, 2014

New York Times Piece About Female Journalists Asks A Question I Can Answer

Once in awhile I veer off the minor league baseball direction to write something broader or more personal here. This time, I decided to take on a story that's being talked about a lot the twenty-four hours.

In a piece for the New York Times this week, journalist Amy Wallace explores the abusive treatment female reporters endure from readers, via message board and other media outlets. She also adds colleagues to that mix and the different struggles women experience in the industry.

In sports, the last truly male-dominated frontier, women are subjected to this more likely than in other industries. We are surrounded. Locker room, press box, sports departments, they're all mostly male.

Earlier this week, Erin Andrews interview with a football player made the rounds and Twitter exploded. He'd gone off the rails in the eyes of viewers, but her reaction was just as talked about. Most gave her tremendous support and made fun of him, not her. But others used it as another reason to criticize or focus on her looks, her ability, and make her out to be a scared (direct comment to her) little girl, unable to handle the big guys.

In addition, this week, I finished reading 'We Killed', a history of women in comedy, by Yael Kohen. I underlined a million things that were as familiar to me in baseball. Comedy, like baseball, is historically a male-driven business. Women have to be tough enough, sharp enough, and literally in comedy, have a healthy sense of humor that deflects the nonsense that has nothing to do with talent or ability.

That brings me to my point.

In the piece, Wallace explains why the "vitriol" is important to pay attention to.

..."it seeks to intimidate and, ultimately, to silence female journalists who write about controversial topics."

The only issue I have with this? We can't be silenced. To suggest women can't take the heat that's been on us since we kicked through press and locker room doors is a mislead. We aren't going to be silenced by some dude tapping away on his computer calling us whores (I've gotten that one on my blog as well) and laughing about how incapable we are as women. Last I checked message boards and social media outlets don't employ these people for opinions.

The story is titled 'Life as a Female Journalist: Hot or Not?" I'm not sure if Wallace is the author of that part or if that was up to the editorial team, but I'll answer. If, by hot, that means it's fun and exciting and interesting and my passion, and, I assume, every journalist's passion, then yes, it's pretty hot. But to sum it up in a few words wouldn't be looking at the whole picture. Some days aren't hot. There's all the typical stuff, comments about gender or looks or ability. That comes and it goes. And guess what? I'm still here. I'm not silenced. I can't be.

There are likely moments where all of us have felt the desire to run for the hills. I've been there. But what's important to clarify, and it's the reason I wrote this, is that we cannot attach ourselves to those words, comments, and sexist thinking. That is not important to our lives or our careers. It changes nothing. If you want to do this with your life, do it and do your job well. That's all you have control over. And, ultimately, what will lead you to wherever it is that you're going in your career. Don't get me wrong. There are still editors and employers that don't hire women as much as they should, or are more interested in a quota. But, again, we continue. Just as every woman before us has.

Is it possible that editors are influenced by the largely male readership of the sports section? Of course. But sports editors aren't reading those comments and deciding anything about us.

Wallace makes a great point, which is the bottom line, and that's that male journalists are ripped apart, but not their bodies. You could argue that. Male journalists are called fat or made fun of for some part of their appearance. I've read it. But there is a deeper, sexual attack that is reserved just for women. It can be scary or stomach-turning, no doubt about it.

There are moments we can't just shrug and keep keeping on. Times when we need to report and expose behavior. I encourage you to do that if you're a journalist or in any industry. Discrimination is against the law. So, no, you do not have to be silent, not about anything, at any moment.

But if you're choosing to do this with your life, understand, your gender and appearance will be commented on by the millions of people that have Twitter or scour message boards for ways to express there knuckle-dragging, confidence-boosting bile. It's an easy target for that part of the uninspired part of the population.

They can drag those knuckles while I'm over here doing my job, getting paid, and doing what they aren't. No woman will be silenced if she doesn't want to be. We can't be intimidated unless we allow it. Speak the hell up, hold your head high and ignore, whatever road you choose to take, either way, you keep going.

Every woman that's come before us handled the heathens and we can do it with a lot more ease than they did. And we have plenty of backup these days. The flip side is, sexist jerks will always exist as they always have. They too will not be fully silenced. We can block them, ignore them, and, if they're our colleagues, we can report them immediately. But they'll still think what they think. And it's not about us. So look at it with detachment. Because those small-minded people can't take your job or your ability to do it.

Moment by moment, choose how you want to invest your energy. Make small, smart choices that will make your life and career 'hotter': block abusers on Twitter, report comments on your stories (there's usually message board rules about those things), deliberately ignore the disgusting or mean-spirited guys commenting on your stories, but reach out happily to those that ask you questions, value your work, and generally debate in a positive, fair way. I've learned to do that last one, and you immediately feel more positive about your work and your relationship with readers. And, you know what? Sometimes, take 'em on. I've done that too. Whether it's a colleague telling me 'You don't look like a baseball writer' (I proceeded to taunt him the entire rest of the game until he did nothing but laugh nervously and say nothing), or players randomly questioning or teasing me (I don't mind being straightforward and snarky with those guys or act like I don't hear them), I have taken them on in a direct way that also made me feel really good.

So, finally, regarding those message board comments, my question- and I would've liked to have made it the title but I resisted- is this: Who gives a sh**?

http://www.nytimes.com/2014/01/20/opinion/life-as-a-female-journalist-hot-or-not.html?smid=tw-share&_r=1

Posted at 07:26 PM in Baseball, Inspirational | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

January 16, 2014

Rays Pitcher Lenny Linsky's Love Of Surfing Influences Approach On The Mound

"It's an exquisite suspension of all things mundane, in which nothing matters but living in that particular instant." ~ Susan Casey, 'The Wave'

"It's all about where your mind's at." ~ Kelly Slater

In the ocean, or on the mound, Lenny Linsky understands the importance of quieting the mind in order to be present.

Surfing gave the Tampa Bay Rays prospect access to spiritual guidance that, when applied to other areas, including baseball, led to his feeling transformed.

"The mental side is what really [led me to it]," Linsky said Thursday. "I wanted to grow more connected to the ocean when I moved to Hawaii, because the ocean has been a part of my entire life."

Growing up in California, in an area known as South Bay located in Los Angeles, near Santa Monica Bay, he was surrounded by water. He spent his childhood on the beach with his parents, developing his love for the nearness of water, as his baseball aspirations also grew.

"I didn't start actually surfing until about four or five years ago. It was a different way to appreciate the ocean."

It started with the Hawaii move. After participating in a showcase there, he received a scholarship offer to attend the University of Hawaii, he gravitated even more to beach life. In a place where surfing is a way of life for many, Linsky felt the pull.

"I knew this was a once in a lifetime opportunity to play baseball in Hawaii. It's such a natural perfect place. My mind was opened."

Drafted in the second round of the 2011 MLB Draft, the righty spent all of 2013 in High-A Charlotte, finishing with a 3.22 ERA with fifty two strikeouts in seventy two innings for the Stone Crabs.

With his baseball career progressing, he started to feel a different pull. He realized that the risks of being on that board in the ocean had gotten too high. His concerns were in line with the Rays. He let go of his hobby, in order to properly focus his energy on his profession.

"Those guys get torn labrums and things like that, and I need to stay in step. Baseball is what's more important. I made the decision to hold off. After my career, hopefully, I can surf another forty years."

A clear, singular mind is part of what he gained in pursuing the hobby. And, despite moving away from it for the time being, the principles of surfing continue to have a strong positive influence on his life and career.

"It really taught me patience. Some days there are no waves, and you're waiting and waiting, or you keep falling out there. That patience has translated to my life and to playing baseball."

This winter he focused on strengthening his core and conditioning, areas he knew needed some work.

"My core needed to be better. And I'm not known for being a long distance runner, but I feel I've improved a lot and gained longevity."

As he prepares for Spring Training in just a few weeks, he reflects on the meaning of surfing, and being close to the water, considering it as much a part of him as baseball.

"The ocean really shaped who I am."

You can follow him on Twitter @alohalinsky34

Posted at 08:19 PM in Baseball, Florida State League, Inspirational, Minor League Baseball, Minor League Prospects, MLB Draft, Non-Fiction Baseball | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

January 10, 2014

Stepping Up: Writer Jacob Garcia's Emotional Road To Baseball Began With Little League Controversy

This is the first installment by a guest writer in the 'Stepping Up' series, which began with my own personal story. The idea for this series was to show how baseball inspired a person's life and/or career. It's to give people a voice about a life-changing moment and overcoming adversity through the power of America's Pastime. Baseball became my voice and I realized that there was a far deeper way for me to express that, and also allow others to do the same.

Jacob Garcia created the website 'Mariners 360' and currently writes for 'Best Coast Baseball.' You can follow him on Twitter at @JakeFG.

Here's his story.

I didn't exactly have an ideal upbringing, mostly because for a good portion of that upbringing I was in a hospital. I was born with a rare lung disease (Children's Interstitial Lung Disease, or chILD) that, from age 1 to age 7, forced me to stay in my hospital room or in my bubble boy-esque house. Since I was usually in the hospital, I didn't really get to see much baseball. When the games were on my TV, I would probably be focused on some type of video game or something else going on. I didn't really get “invested” in the game until I was a bit older than the typical “Little Leaguer”.

In 2003, at a little over 7 years of age, I was finally able to celebrate my birthday at home for the first time in years. This was because I was put on supplemental oxygen and, as odd as it may sound, it profoundly affected my life in a plethora of good ways. It wasn't until the next year that I was introduced to the game by a family friend.

He coached a little league team and we (the friend, my parents and myself) decided that getting me into some type of sport would teach me how to be a part of a team and what it's like to be a “regular” kid. The latter, of course, being my reasoning.

I was slightly hesitant at first, just as any other kid would be. I thought to myself: “Pssh, how hard can eight year old kids throw?”, I learned very quickly just how hard they can throw. And hit. By the time our fifth game rolled around, I was finally given my first start of the season. The second I ran on the field for the first inning and really took it all in, I was hooked. By the end of the year, I'd be fully engaged with every aspect of the game.

My first full year of playing ball in my local little league, at 12, would prove to be my most difficult. I started off the year like any other kid – I participated in tryouts, I practiced with my team and I played the game. Sounds pretty great, right? Well, it was until my first double header of the season and I was excited as I could be. My parents had just given me $10 so I could buy anything I wanted from the concession stands. Life was pretty good for me that day. Until I took the field.

I had played about 1 1/3 innings before I came up to bat. When I did, the umpire stepped out from behind the plate, glanced at me then my oxygen tank with a cold stare and turned to the score keepers box...and with a monotone, seemingly uncaring voice announced “number 7, ejected”. I was number 7. I caught myself with my jaw on the ground as my manager came out to get an explanation. He fought for me, even getting himself ejected. I had to be dragged into the dugout and I stayed there for the remainder of the two games.

It was a weird feeling...being banned from the game I love because of something I couldn't control.

You see, once Little League headquarters caught wind of the situation, they instantly banned me from playing and practicing until they could review my case. This could have taken until June...of the next year. I wasn't sure how to handle myself. I didn't know if I wanted to speak out and put up a fight or let the system take its time. My life was in the air. My future of playing ball in jeopardy.

It wasn't until the following Tuesday, my next scheduled practice, that my coaches told me to come down to practice. I wasn't allowed to participate in team activities - my parents were warned that I could not even step foot on the fields,practice or otherwise. But my teammates wondered where I was, and my coach wanted to talk to me, personally, so we went to the field. Damned be the fearful.

After the coaches finally managed to pull me away from the guys and my mom away from the other parents, they told us one of the assistant coaches on our team had contacted a local media source. And that was when the figurative excrement hit the fan.

Within a matter of hours, my home phone was ringing off the hook. We were getting calls from all of the local media outlets and within a day, my story was running on the top headlines of CNN and MSNBC. During the games I missed, I kept score and spent time working in the concession stands when my team wasn't playing. It was almost sickening watching these kids I had practiced with all preseason getting to play, while I had to sit back and watch because of my lung disease. I was, once again, being held back because of this disease. I felt an irrepressible anger toward everything. But, that all changed very soon...

I missed exactly three games before they (Little League HQ) decided I was “okay to play” and that my tank “posed no actual harm”. After hearing the story, friends, family and total strangers overwhelmed their emails and, at one point, crashed the LL computer system. They had to literally rewrite the rulebook so I could play, without having to face the same type of issues in future seasons. Not only did I make it possible for me to play, I made it possible for any kid on oxygen to play ball. It was an incredible feeling. My emotions had been put on a roller coaster but they made it through...just barely.

By my junior year, I decided that playing ball wasn't going to be a part of my future. My talent level wasn't matching the other guys out there so, I called it quits. Hung up my cleats and walked away. Little did I know, the game itself would still VERY much remain in my cards.

That’s when my personal life started to take a turn for a worse. As with most kids who were raised in hospitals and were consistently told they were going to die soon, I suffered from clinical depression. It didn’t help that I had (and still battle with to this day) social anxiety. I usually had baseball to help keep me from, well, myself. But once that was gone, I didn’t have an outlet anymore. Just like that, my life was (seemingly) meaningless. I was in therapy for about 10 months before I could even begin to see a change.

Right when I saw myself starting that turn for the better, the worst of the worst struck me. My grandmother had been in the hospital for a few days for reasons unknown to me. By her third day, I finally worked up the courage to visit her. We had a great relationship and I could always go to her for anything. She had helped raise me, and she listened to me. Always. When my mom was driving me to the hospital, she thought that it would be best the time to tell me. She had cancer. I didn’t want to believe it. I didn’t. I held out hope that the doctors were wrong. I visited with her, we laughed and spent the day with her. The next day, her doctor came in and broke the news. She did, in fact, have liver cancer. He also told the three of us that the cancer couldn’t be fought, as it was too far along. Right then and there, it felt like my heart shattered and I had been sucker punched in the stomach. We spent each and every day (and some nights) with her until the night she passed away.

I needed a new outlet. I couldn’t play ball anymore so that option was off the table. But, after a little bit of fiddling around, a light bulb went off: “I annoy everyone when I start talking about baseball, why not just start writing about it?”. Before long, I was writing posts and getting an idea of what it took to actually be a writer.

I titled the blog “Mariners 360” (as I was writing about my hometown team, the Seattle Mariners) and simply started putting down my thoughts about the team. In all honesty, it was pretty terrible. I didn’t like how it looked, how it read - anything. So, I reached out to other writers and asked them: “what do you think I should change about my site?” More often than not, I received valuable feedback. It led me to completely re-design the site, the format of my posts...just about everything. With the help of some friends, I had a brand new site on my hands.

Once version 2.0 of the site came out, everything changed. I started really pushing social media. Using my own personal Twitter and Facebook accounts, as well as the Twitter account I made for M360. After a while, I started getting support from some local writers who helped me grow as a writer myself and, occasionally, as a person. I saw myself change from this shy kid who really didn’t want anything to do with socialization and wasn’t too keen on seeing the bright side of things, to someone who openly reached out to others and was happily watching his world be flipped upside down.All in all, baseball has been a north star of sorts for me. It’s kept me sane when I’ve felt like completely imploding. There have been times where I’ve felt like throwing out everything I’ve ever known, but the one thing that has remained consistent is baseball. There are some imperceptible things in life that I hold so sacred. A beloved feeling toward an ages-old game may seem odd to others, but it’s one of the few things that has kept my feet on the ground. Honestly, I wouldn’t want it any other way.